After a few years of married life, a man finds that he is unable to perform. He goes to his doctor, and his doctor tries a few things but nothing works. Finally the doctor says to him: "This is all in your mind" and refers him to a psychiatrist.
After a few visits, the shrink confesses: "I am at a loss as to how you could possibly be cured." Finally the psychiatrist refers him to a witch doctor.
The witch doctor says: "I can cure this." He throws some powder on a flame, and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke. The witch doctor says: "This is powerful healing, but you can only use it once a year!
All you have to do is say '1-2-3' and it shall rise for as long as you wish!"
The guy then asks the witch doctor: "What happens when it's over?" The witch doctor says: "All you or your partner has to say is '1234' and it will go down. But be warned; it will not work again for a year!"
The guy goes home and that night he is ready to surprise his wife with the good news. So, he is lying in bed with her and says: "1-2-3" and suddenly he gets an erection.
His wife turns over and says: "What did you say '1-2-3' for?"
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
I have an interesting story to relate about what happened last night(see post below for more information). I am 18 years old. I was at my friend Tater's house, talking to String Bean. He informs me that a 43 year old g-milf is texting him. I didn't believe it until he showed me the messages. She is 43, has three children, two of whom are older than Bean and myself, and one grandchild. String Bean decides he doesn't really wanna sleep with this woman, so I ask if he'll pass the torch to me. He agrees. I begin texting this 43 year old woman, and she starts telling me about herself, like what she looks like, where she lives, etc... At this point i'm rather excited. I am going to sleep with this lady if for nothing else, bragging rights. I should have known. I wake up this morning and look at my phone. I have a message asking me to call her so we can talk. I'm iffy, as i'm no longer drunk. However, I call. Gentlemen let me tell you, this woman was so black sounding, I almost shit my pants. And apparently she didn't want a one night stand, she wanted a relationship. She was asking me about kids and marriage. I panic. I decide there's only option for me now. I have to pretend to die. Not really, but the thought crossed my mind. Anyway, I talked to her before calmly explaining how, if she was either a: Just black, or b: Just 43, I would be fine, but both is a bit much for me. Then she proceeds to ask me why I have a problem with interracial marriage. I try to explain that that's not the case, but shes adamant. She's becoming frustrated now, so I hung up the phone. I will soon set her up with one of my friends, just like String Bean did to me.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
I've seen so many ppl drawin artsy and amazing pictures with paint on their blogs, and I am jealous. Therefore, i will begin drawing a picture everyday(except saturdays probably maybe) that describes my day. I start today, even though nothing happened today..Ok scratch that, as pointed out by kindly Mr. Grim, as i was walking back to my dorm after trig class, i saw a human/lion hybrid rawring at a cat, who was unimpressed